In general, it is pretty difficult to be relaxed when you are going on a first date. You have no idea what the date is going to be, how it is going to go and whether you’ll even like your date. All of this is okay though because if you enter the date with confidence, you’ll be much more likely to get a good outcome from the date and even if it still goes wrong, you’ll still feel like a million dollars.
This one is aimed more at the guys than the girls, as they are usually pretty good at wearing something that makes them look great without overdoing it. Most guys fall in to two camps when they go out on dates, the tuxedo and tails camp and the ‘whatever was on the floor’ camp. Neither of these are the right thing to get dressed up in. Tux people, you are trying to hard. Unless you wear a tux every day as part of your real personality, it’ll be obvious that this isn’t really how you dress and that you have put it on just to be more impressive than you really are. Cut it out and wear something sensible. Even worse than that, are the guys that dress in whatever was on the floor. Make an effort! You can’t expect to attract and wow a date when you are wearing shorts and a stained t-shirt. You wouldn’t expect your date to turn up wearing three day old clothes, so neither should you.The correct thing to wear on a date depends on the season and your personal fashion preferences. If it is a colder season, wear dress pants with a nice pressed clean shirt and a sports coat. Pair this with a belt and pair of smart shoes that are the same colour. Don’t mix and match them and make sure that you wear clean, polished shoes if appropriate.
Don’t Let Conversation Lapse
A lot of people find that awkward gaps in conversation one of the most common things that ruin first dates. If you are having a meal and nobody is saying anything, it can be quite nerve wracking and your brain will just shut down, which really doesn’t help the issue. The way to get over all of this is of course to prepare a few topics of conversation and open ended questions that will get you both talking. Try to ask things that can lead on to discussions and talk about things that people are likely to be interested. Whilst a cliché, it is better to ask silly questions and see what music your date likes then to sit there in silence. In addition to preparing these questions, have an idea about what you want to tell your date if they happen to ask you any questions (which they will!). Don’t be afraid to tell them that you are good at things, you are not showing off if you are talented in a given area. Don’t feel like you have to prove anything to your date, you should be getting to know each other, not figuring out who is ‘better’.If you are having trouble on a date, remember that you should both be trying to relax each other rather than acting in an antagonizing manner. People always remember those that make them feel at ease and if you can manage to calm your date down, you’ll be able to make them remember you better. A lot of people when they are anxious avoid eye contact and this will register in the other person’s subconscious, making it so that they think you are not interested in them. Make sure that you are showing the correct body language to your date and everything should go smoothly.Confidence is a funny thing, it comes and goes as days go by and most people think that it is impossible to just make yourself feel more confident. However, there are simple things you can do to improve your confidence and lower anxieties. Standing up tall and keeping good posture is a proven way to improve confidence. In addition to this, holding you head high and looking upwards rather than down makes your body adapt a more open shape, which in turn makes you feel much better. This is commonly used for people suffering from depression and will help you feel better on the way to your date.Whilst you shouldn’t put on a front and act in a manner that isn’t congruent with how you usually act, the saying ”Fake it till you make it” seems relevant here. If you are pretending to be confident, your body and brain will often follow suit, making you naturally confident.