Dating is a fun experience where two people spend time together and enjoy each other’s company. However,dating can also be difficult and cast a dark shadow over the essence of having them in the first place. Different couples have different experiences on dates and each of them is unique from the other. If your experience with dating is bliss,then you will develop a positive attitude and remain optimistic of eventually finding a compatible partner. Remember,all dates are unique so for every good person, there is another that stinks.If you have gone through difficulties in the dating life, you tend to be extra cautious with every new guy you meet and inevitably it shows, in the way you present yourself and even in the way you talk. This will then rub off on your date and the result is a tense experience that none of you want a repeat of. The sad thing is that for ladies, the more time passes by the more difficult it seems to sustain a date that results in a full blown relationship. The fact that they see every day is passing as ‘the time running out,’ will further complicates the matter.
Dating starts to seem exhaustive and a waste of time, even though,you will have a feeling which keeps on telling you that it is mandatory. What happens next, is to start forcing on the issues caused by dating regardless of how you feel. This only complicates the issue further and the negative attitude that had developed will gets even worse.The right thing to do is take a step back and analyze the predicament that you find yourself in. More often than not, you realize that you are not probably the one with issues and this is something that can be fixed with relative ease. Here are the simplest ways to overcome difficulties in dating.
Have a little patience
When you are in a hurry to begin with, regardless of whether you have gone through a difficult relationship or not, you tend to fall for anyone that comes along. You will start attracting partners that do not suit you just for the sake of dating and subsequently, you will miss the clear warning signs that would be obvious in a different situation.You unknowingly put yourself on the market for any and all takers. You start acting and doing things you would not normally do as a way to guarantee success by the way of approval. I do not need to spell out how big a disaster this will turn out to be as you should be able to evaluate its ultimate effect. Patience is a virtue and with that, you will be able to assess all comers from various perspectives before you commit. In this way, you can increase the chance of dating with a guy who is right for you and as a result, it ceases to be about perseverance and becomes an enjoyable experience for all parties.
Don’t be too rigid
When you consider dating, you already have some idea of dating that you would like, the kind of partner you are looking for and what you expect from them. Some of these expectations can be a bit over the edge and you may need to tone them back a peg or two. Most couples have buckled under the pressure of expectation and this is something that can be avoided.A little flexibility goes a long way in showing commitment to a partner. If you show that you are willing to stretch yourself for your partner and maybe do something that you would otherwise not do just for him, the sacrifice is not lost on them. If you make small changes in your wardrobe to suit him for instance, he will also tweak a thing just for you that is the result mutual understanding.There are even cases where a girl has unreasonable financial expectations that all good guys available to her cannot fulfill. This makes the concept more like a business partnership than a companionship.
Trust your instinct
Everyone has a small voice inside their hearts that give strong opinions when they are facing any dilemma. When it comes to dating, especially the part where you choose partners, there is always going to be either a voice of approval or disapproval. More often than not, your conscience is looking out so you should always take it seriously.When you get the nark that someone is not right for you, do not ignore it for some benefits that might be immediate like maybe the guy has a lot of money or is probably very funny- traits common in womanizers. Ask yourself why the alarms are going off and take appropriate measures.Alternatively, you may write someone off because he does not meet some of your ‘criteria’ which might be farfetched. The voice will again try to tip you in the right direction and this again calls for flexibility in your requirements. You might miss out on the ‘Mr. Right’ for flimsy reasons that are not worth it.
Play your part
The universe has an established order that is not to be tampered with. As a lady, you should be wooed by the guy who is interested in you. All guys love the challenge of courting women. This makes it worth waiting and gives the lady an aura that would not exist if things happened in any other way.
Most women make the mistake of sleeping with guys, essentially ‘giving it up’ even a week after they meet. This makes the lady look easy and cheap if one date is all it takes to get you in the sack. “She must have done this with lots of other guys” is what the guy ends up concluding. Nine times out of ten, he will not stick around. Let the man work for it and use the time to properly get to know him and find out his real intentions. This will even make the man appreciate your dignity and this transcends into respect for you as a woman. No man loves an easy catch. Test the lengths he would go for you and see how much he really values you. This will be lost if you hit the sack within the first few days.
In any relationship, the roles are clearly defined. When you are wrong, accept it and take responsibility. If change from your part is required to savage the relationship, do not be afraid to cede ground. You should also appreciate if he changes his behavior for you for example smoking, do not be surprised if he requests you to stop wearing that extra small skirt when going to work. That is normal.The most common weakness in ladies is insecurity. They will check pockets, go through phone texts and even answer their partners’ calls just to ensure no foul play is ongoing. This is the biggest turn off for guys when you even quarrel with female colleagues on suspicion that they are ‘stealing’ your man. Have a little faith in your partner and give him benefit of doubt unless in extreme circumstances. This will make him feel trusted and at the same time make you look dignified as opposed to an obsessed overprotective psychopath. This is a huge turn off and the relationship you are guarding so jealously will end abruptly as this gradually pushes him away.
Clearly, dating is not as straight forward as it looks. In my opinion, it is not easy as this would dilute its real significance. Challenging as it may be, it is totally worth the trouble because when it goes right, it is a magical experience.